A post from a couple of years ago popped up on my Facebook the other day. I reread my words and felt all over again the same level of intensity. I pray that I will never ever forget. This is what I wrote… In the last two weeks, I have been on the scene of nearly 40 deaths in the Reno – Sparks area. I have removed suicide victims ranging in age from 14 to 70, who used every method possible to end their lives. I have been in fancy homes and seedy hotels. I have seen people die with family all around them and those that were only found because they were late on their rent. (more…)

I decided today that I love my life. That may sound simple but I have not always felt that way. My life, like most others, is marked by some serious struggles that often get the best of me. Health concerns, relationship problems, constant feelings of inadequacy and inferiority, challenging family dynamics, it is all there and wears on me constantly. I realized tonight that I love my life. Why? I was standing in the kitchen window at church and I saw Rita walking down the driveway, heading to the neighbors house. She was quite a ways off and was walking with a little bit of a limp, a condition that she will probably have forever since slipping in the snow last winter. As I watched her, I thought about how long I have loved her and all of the life that we’ve built together. She loves me. She has given her life to me. I have been watching her walk for over 30 years. I haven’t always been the greatest husband, not the worst either, but I am amazed everyday that she is faithfully by my side, whatever comes our way. She is the love of my life and, because of that, I love my life.

 

But there is more. I have four children who call me dad. There is no greater reward than that. No greater title. It cannot be bought, it cannot be forced, it must be given and, to me, it has been given – 4 times! I have not been the best dad, certainly not the worst, and yet, I am still amazed each time one of them calls me dad. Yes, I love my life.

 

If that weren’t enough, there is more. For the last eleven years, the most mysterious thing has been happening. Some time ago, an incredible God began to speak to the heart of an undeserving young man. He began to speak of an incredible task that, with His help, I would be prepared to take on. Through prodding, pruning, and preparation, I now have a group of amazing people that call me “pastor”. Once again, not the best at the job but certainly not the worst and yet, it amazes me every single time that I hear it. I will forever be amazed at the way God has taken the circumstances of my life, all of its ups and downs, and somehow uses them, and me, to speak of His amazing grace and immeasurable love for all people. I love my life because He loves me.

 

And now, in a strange twist of circumstances, I have an opportunity that I didn’t see coming. Teacher, they call me teacher. One of the most noble profession in the world and I am afforded the opportunity to be one. Incredible. Today, while watching my beautiful third grade class working so hard, I felt a little choked up. They are so innocent and trusting and look to me to guide them into a life that they can’t even remotely understand or anticipate. I work with some amazing people that have given themselves completely to the profession. They don’t do it for the money, they don’t do it for fame. They do it because they can’t imagine doing anything else. I will never be the best teacher, certainly not the worst either, but will continue to be amazed at the magic of young people. I love my life because my life is being used to help them find theirs.

 

I love my life because Rita is my wife and the love of my life, my children call me dad, people call me pastor and children call me teacher, and, above all, I have a God who entrusted it all to me. What is not to love? Yes, I love my life and wouldn’t change it if you promised me all the money, possessions, and fame in the world.

I just watched a newscast where a pastor in Sacramento was celebrating the atrocities that were committed to PEOPLE in Orlando this weekend, stating that the only tragedy was that more were not killed. It makes me sick. I am a pastor and I take my responsibility very seriously. When I was called into ministry, something very strange happened. My heart became abnormally sensitive to people, all people, not just people like me or that live in my community or my country, not just people who think like me or have something to offer, but all people. I feel terrible that some will think that this guy has spoken for me, or others who identify themselves as Christians. Though he has not voiced my opinion, some will believe that that is how we all feel.  (more…)